Firefly's Light

I've seen so much firefly's light
emitted as of late, from so many
Even from those whom don't know
where they got this precious light
I wonder where the beauty
of the firefly's light comes from
Just as the thought forms in my head
I hear a familiar voice say
the firefly's light comes from me

Then I answer, of course it does Father
He then tell me the firefly's light is but
a minute part of the light you carry within your heart
The light I gave you in the beginning
There are no words all I can say is
Thank You Father

Loving Him

She'd never known a love like they share

At least until she allowed Him to come into her heart
close to the dawn of this year
in the mist of the storm she was in
for a while people question her devotion to Him
She's learning to trust Him
She now knows the only one she must answer to is Him

Loving Him is like breathing to her
He speaks to her where she's at
as He does with all of us
Every believers relationship with Him is different
though loving Him is something we all have in common
She will continue loving Him throughout eternity

When It's Time

When it's time my soul will be

flooded in His peace
A peace the likes of which
I've never felt before
Endless tears of happiness
pour from a heart once gracefully broken

When it's time my soul will take flight
on the wings of a dove
as pure as white snow
Higher and higher my soul will soar
into His waiting arms

Love

Love is a place from where

true beauty flows
The love I feel for others flows
straight from Him as He took my
place on the cross that day

Christmas Is In The Air

The story of His birth will be told

just as it has every year before
I know Christmas is in the air
the first time I hear it
The stars also seem a little brighter
then at any other time throughout the year

Holy Ghost Whine

Oh I can't wait for that drink

the one that changes lives forever
It's just another one of the great gifts
He has given to His people
If you've never tasted it
you don't know what you're missing

It has just begun changing me for the better
I will never go back to who I was
before I took that first sip
If He prompts me to drink
for the rest of my days
I will rejoice and gladly
do so as I praise Him endlessly

It's better than an alcoholic hangover
A hangover you may never want to come off of
It even contains powers to heal
What is it you may ask?
Well, it's holy ghost whine of course

When I Feel Weakest

When I feel weakest

I pray Lord I need you
I ask for the strength to carry me through this storm
The rain is heavy and clouds are dark
hiding your bright light from my sight
I need you to take flight

He gentility reminds me
I am here child
I see your pain though
I promise your troubles are mild
Although, you can't see you will make it
to the other side

Suddenly, He's there surrounding me in love
restoring the faith He gave me
before I was clay in His hands
When I feel weakest the faith I have
makes me believe I will be stronger because
He's brought me too far to leave me now

His Love Flows

I have a new friend

She carries His light wherever she goes
Like me she has a hopeful heart in which a powerful
story has begun taking shape
A story through which His love flows

Her heart has seen its share of breaks
Yet, I know His grace will fill it to overflow
causing Him to use her to deliver a powerful
message only she can
I pray all her hopes and dreams come true and
our newfound friendship can withstand the tests
of the journeys we're now on

Friday Morning's Dream

This morning she was granted a reprieve from

the nightmares she cares not to remember
The kind that makes her wake asking
What the heck was that?
a question she's been asking herself
frequently as of late

This Friday morning's dream
allowed her to find a friend she's been missing
Positive energy radiating from her as it always has
Her friend said something they often repeated
You can do this!
Just like that she felt strength
she just needed to be reminded she had

The next thing she knew she woke up
tears streaming down her face
No! I want to see how this Friday morning's dream ends
Why wake me now?
Oh heck, I've never gotten to see how my Felicia dreams end anyway
It was then she knew her friend's
positive energy would carry her through her day

Her Pen Bleeds

Her pen bleeds with emotions she

tries to keep locked inside
Sometimes she fears people wouldn't understand if
she lent her voice to the expression of these pent up feelings
Yet she has a poet's heart

Her pen bleeds with hope as fragile as
priceless crystal which
could shatter at any moment
like the heart keeping her alive
Although it is this hope that is the one thing propelling
her toward her dreams

Her pen bleeds with love
Love she prays she'll one day share
with someone who will love her just as
much as she loves them

Right now though her pen will keep
bleeding until the ink runs out
She hopes this doesn't happen for years
After all it was God
that gave this poet her gift

Candle

Burning brightly, a mix of yellow and orange

Flame, dancing to its own rhythm free
Dreams, carried on smoke rising from the wick
Candle, you are more than just wax flame and barely
perceptible rings of smoke

One of the Gifts He Gave Me

People often ask me where the inspiration for this

poetry I write comes from
My answer use to be
Well, the inspiration can come from anywhere

I've started noticing that much of the poetry I write
these days is coming from a much deeper place and
I am just the soulful vessel through which verse flows
In other words I am the pen
He uses to get some of His messages across
This is one of the gifts He gave me and
I will continue to carry on the honor of
this gift for as long as He allows

Fire To Ice

How did we go from having a love

that burned hot as fire
to one as cold as ice?
Our dreams became mine
What did you see for us?
I gave you everything I had and
well you gave me nothing

You say you love me but
my dear you've shown me nothing besides heartbreak
My calls go unanswered or a cold voice prompts
me to leave a message
What is that, a new form of love I don't know about?

How did we go from having a love
that burned hot as fire
to one as cold as ice?
Do you even care anymore?
When you decide to be a man and
treat your woman as she deserves
let me know
However I may be taken
by the time that happens

Beyond The Wheelchair

She rolls in, you speak to the person she's with, but

to her you say nothing and stare
She says hello, dead silence answers
Why is she not worth the two seconds
it would take you to respond?
Yes she can talk so don't be afraid to hold a conversation with her

If she didn't respond to your questions because
you were different: would you not feel ignored?
If you have questions why not ask?
She won't be offended
that's a promise she can make here and now

Have you ever seen a wheelchair before?
To her the wheelchair is just one small part of many
unique parts that make her who she is
If you can look beyond the wheelchair
you'll see a woman who has a huge heart and
isn't afraid to share it
You'll see that her mission in life is to
teach you that differences aren't meant to be feared
Instead, differences are meant to be embraced

Her Heartbeat

Haven't heard her heartbeat in a little more than two years

The one that sustained her, the woman who gave me life
It may seem so trivial,
How can I miss the rhythm I got to know so well?
The rhythm I longed to hear first thing in morning's light and
last before night's slumber
The rhythm that softly let me know everything would be okay


When she got ill her heartbeat made me believe in miracles
The kind prayers are sent up to ask for
What I wouldn't give to hear the sound that was uniquely hers once again

Beautifully Broken

I've done this entirely too much lately

watching people I love being pushed and pulled on
the thin line between life and death
You may not see my tears or any outward signs of grief but
trust me they are there

Sleepless nights spent wondering
why this keeps happening
Knowing in my head it's not my fault but
my heart tells me I should be there
Prayers sent up from beneath  moonlight
Endless tears in the dead of night
strangled sobs  no one can hear
Why?
Because it's not about me
I have to be strong for everyone else
crying isn't an option 
That was a lesson  I learned
a few years ago

I am becoming a pro at being
beautifully broken
Yet that doesn't stop my heart from shattering
each time I get the news a loved one is
about to be called home
I will be strong but I'll remain beautifully broken till
I see my loved ones again one day

Memories

Sometimes she wraps herself in memories

like blankets to keep warm on cold nights
Yet there are still nights like tonight when even
the good memories tug at her heartstrings
Even the slightest of tugs at times causing
her heart to break

Saved

She officially gave her heavenly father her heart once again

On some level there is a peace she's never known before but,
there's a spirit trying to steal her from Him through temptation
To that spirit she says I am His and because
I am His daughter you must remember,
No weapon formed against me shall prosper

This past week she's seen prayers answered
as soon as she's prayed
She wants to follow Him whole heartedly and
will do so, because she wants nothing more
than to be His, to be clean, covered by His blood and to stay pure at heart
He saved her, in turn she will live as He sees fit
she can never repay the debt she owes but
she will never stop trying
thank you Father

The Heart of a Teddy Bear

 He tries to act tough but

she sees past the mask he wears
His secret is safe with her;
it always will be this she can promise
from now on
She's sure others see past his toughness though

He inspires her to want more for herself
More than she knew she could give
He always makes her work hard
She loves to say he tortures her
She has a little secret of her own
she'd have it no other way
It's all worth it, if it will give
her a better quality of life

She sees right into the heart of a teddy bear
She never expected to find a friend
on this journey she's now on
Let alone someone who has
the heart of a teddy bear
The hugs they share are the
best moments of her day

To my friend with the heart of a teddy bear
I am so blessed to have you in my life
Thank you for everything you've done for me
Never stop being the tough guy with a heart
bigger than you let on
You have found your place in my heart
where you will forever stay

Hearts And Flowers

My heart beats for you Valentine

The hearts and flowers you give to me with love
serve as simple gestures that let me know
My heart is yours forever

To The Girl Inside

To the girl inside my heart who

at times makes me feel so weak
I hear you loud and clear
the tears that run down my face at night
dear girl are yours
I know you're hurting deeply
You're thinking life isn't fair
Sadly, I'm sorry to tell you you're right

Even though you can't see the light beyond
the pain you now feel
It shines brighter than we could ever imagine
We're about to be changed for the better
I will never let you give up!
We owe ourselves a chance
to see where this life takes us

Remember God has to break us so
He can mold us into the person
He always knew we could be
The pain you feel
had to pass through Him first
You're the one always reassuring me
there is beauty in the breaking
Hold on girl our beauty is coming

Careless Words

Careless words at least to her, are like bullets from a gun

They have the power to pierce the heart
leaving broken pieces in their wake
They can rob you of faith trust and love
A love you once thought was never failing
from a person you thought would or could
never hurt you

Careless words can make one question their own strength
If she's being honest that's happened to her
more than a few times
in the not so distant past
You say she's weak
Who are you to make
that assumption?
You haven't lived in her shoes for one day
so until you do you have no room to talk

Your ignorance evokes tears she refuses to let you see
Why should she give you that satisfaction?
She knows you don't care to see the damage
your careless words are creating
How would you feel if she were treating you that same way?

She has done nothing to warrant this
vile treatment you've shown her
Yet despite everything, she still tries to
give you the respect you don't deserve at times
This may come as a shock to you but,
she believes in treating others the way she
would want to be treated
That is a value you can't shake her free of
no matter how many careless words you use

Your careless words will no longer evoke tears
from somewhere deep within
Maybe then you'll see the woman
you say you thought she was
If you don't, she knows who she is and
that's all that matters

Message From The Heart

You've done so much for me

Seen me through some of the best
moments of my life which
you helped to create
Sometimes I felt I wasn't able to give one hundred percent but
having you on my team made me want to push
myself further than I knew I could
You helped turn frowns into smiles
smiles I never thought I'd see from myself again

You took my heart fixing
some of the broken pieces redefining what love means
I know I've thanked you countless times but
all I have is this message from the heart
I hope on those days when
it seems a little gray
remember you helped change a life and forever
left your mark on my heart

You Were

Once Upon A Time

you were the center of my world
You were the first person I thought of
at first mornings light and
the last one I thought of before the stars blanketed the sky at night
You were my diamond I treasured with all my heart
I find myself wondering if that meant anything to you
You shined brighter than anything I'd ever seen
You were my Valentine for sixteen years
I loved you more than I loved myself

I wish I could've been the diamond of your heart
Lord knows you were mine
I still wish we could make it work but
I don't want to need you like I once did
it would hurt too much

Real Connection

What happened to friends visiting, having face to face time?

Giving people time to develop relationships and or friendships
that could change one's life in ways they never dreamed of?
What I like to call real connection
I don't know about you but, I miss the days
before everyone knew about
posting, tweeting snapping and
all the other new fancy ways of communicating
When you actually had to make time for others

I won't tell you those modes of communication
don't make life easier but at what cost?
It's so sad to think the next generation may
not even understand the message
I'm trying to convey in these lines
Please hear me, I say this from the bottom of my heart
I beg you, please don't let real connection die

I Promised

From the first time we met I promised you

I'd be there no matter what
in the brightness of sunny days or the darkness of stormy nights
After all isn't that what best friends do?
You are the sister I chose for myself
I couldn't imagine my life without you in it

You've apologized for not being a good friend at times
I guess as long as we're apologizing I have to say
I'm sorry for not always being there
when you needed me in the past
Yet you still remind me who I am when the world
doesn't see me in the same light as you do
I promise I will be your strength when God forbid
you find you are weak
I can be strong for both of us
if you need me to be

I Am

I am only human which means

I am subject to making mistakes
Sometimes those mistakes get repeated unintentionally but,
isn't that the very definition of what it means to be human?
I am not perfect, nor do I claim to be but,
I am learning this life is a never ending process

When my mistakes are repeated
I don't think my past should be
thrown back in my face
I don't throw your past back at you because
I know some of it hurts like hell
just like mine does
The shame I feel should be enough
of a scar to remind me of what went wrong

I wish you could see me for who I really am
Your sister who wants a relationship with you
Stop treating me as if I'm broken,
needing to be fixed because
it's breaking my spirit
You'll never know how much you've broken my heart
yet still I find the strength to love you

The Stain of Negativity

Don't you know the stain of negativity

permeates everything it touches?
She thought you resolved to let it all go
Maybe you like the darkness cast by this stain
If you do, you'll be there alone

She's gotten a taste of a more positive life and
wants to take the chances that
may open up like budding flowers to her
She couldn't see the light through this stain which settled upon her
Thank God for allowing her some crystal clear clarity
which in the long run will be a cherished gift

Pray

Pray when the sun of life is at its brightest
as the clouds dissipate to endless blue
Pray when God wakes you to face another day
Every chance you get give Him the thanks and praise He more than deserves
Always remembering, He is our light, heartbeat and breath of life

Pray when storms seem to pour their rain upon you
The winds might toss you where they may
All the while, you'll know one day this too shall pass
Pray you will soar on eagle's wings
past these storms you now face
high in the skies of heaven

River Flowing

Your love is like a river flowing

so pure and unwavering
This river without end
You only asked for her heart
nothing more, nothing less
She knows her soul is unclean
marked by sin of the not to distant past

As the burden of this darkness weighs her down
she wonders if you might still allow this river flowing to
cleanse and wash her sin away
Giving her forgiveness
she isn't able to grant herself at this moment
So she can feel your love like a river flowing once again

The Call of Her Heart

The air around her has been alive with sparks today

Sparks that could ignite at anytime and
she's ashamed to admit she almost
let the sparks of rage get the better of her
Her temper started fraying
then she heard a voice say,
"My child I am here, you are not alone"
I hear you

She then did what He asked and
listened to the call of her heart
Prayer flowed through song lyrics
Song lyrics she never heard prayer in before
the only thing she can think is that
His mercy and grace are still there
if she'd just follow the call of her heart

I'm Sorry

Dear Lord I know I owe you the deepest of apologies

I'm sorry doesn't even begin to cover
the choices I've made since that wonderful day
you saved this broken soul
You took the time to guide this heart of mine
on the path of grace and love and for that
I am and forever will be grateful

I'm sorry I fell so far so fast
Please take this heart and soul burning out all
that is not of you
Replacing it with everything that is you
I miss the fire you put inside me
The fire that burned deep in my bones
The fire I couldn't wait to tell anyone about
The fire that has been cooled by
secrets that lie deep in me

All I can do is ask for your forgiveness and
pray you see how sorry I am 

Why

Today oh Lord I have some questions I feel

I must ask at this moment in time
Since you blessed me with the gift of poetic verse
I'll use it to help others
who find themselves sitting where I sit now

Why did you give me such a loving heart?
A loving heart that wants so badly to
cling to the belief people are good at heart?
A heart that seems to be breaking
over and over again as of late?

Why do people insist on violating the
fragile thing I call trust?
I will patiently await your answers to
all these questions
Thank you Lord for your time

I Won

It was like I won the lottery when

I opened my heart to you and
your Holy Spirit made his home there
Heck, these feelings I carry inside each day are better
than the high one receives from winning money
A high I never thought I'd feel again
after losing loved ones I thought
I never would   

I know, maybe I was sheltered
The pain I felt was like having
a thousand pound weight on my chest
This pain is the kind you never think will heal
that was until He let me know
He will turn all my pain into something of beauty

The joy I feel knowing He wakes me
in the morning to face another day
good, bad or somewhere between the two
makes me stronger despite what others may think
I won happiness and
freedom because
He laid His life down at the cross for me
I'm beyond grateful for His sacrifice
I have chosen to live and
will choose to live for Him because
He is more than worthy of that
sacrifice on my part

Don't

I showed myself to you yesterday
nothing hidden or held back
You and I have a closeness only we understand
I have been there for you since
the beginning of time
My plans for you will blow your mind
I love you more than you can ever imagine

All your dreams and hearts desires
will come true
So this is my plea child
I have never nor will I ever give up on you
All I ask is that you
keep your focus on me
don't give up on the gift of faith I've given you

I Cry

Prophetic worship playing through my headphones

My heart filling to a point of overflow with tearful praise
I cry out I need you Lord, oh how I need you

I Love You But...

I love you but, not the way you think

I can't lie saying I never felt that kind of love for you but
I prayed He would burn the feelings I once had out of me
After you left me one day hiding un-cried tears burning my eyes
He told me that you would not ever break my heart again

Since that day I see you through different eyes
I see you through His eyes
Now I see there is potential in you
more than you realize
I only hope one day you are able to see
yourself through God's eyes like I do
Yes, I love you but
it's not out of feeling it's because
I made a choice to do so
despite my hurt and pain

From Pain to Beautiful

When He found me I was floating in an ocean of pain

I had been hurt more than I ever thought I would be
Tears streaming down my face in the dark night of this soul
tears I thought might drowned me more than once
He showed up for me as His word always says He will

The first time I heard the voice of my father
I stopped crying to hear Him say
I will take you from pain to beautiful
if you let me

Then I thought, half way between being awake and slumber
why would He take me from pain to beautiful?
I'm not sure I ever got the complete answer but,
I trust Him with all that I am